much respect...
*being almost done with finals gives folx time to reply to questions they've always wanted to!*
having been president of the black student union for this year i have watched people come and go. and with each one i have tried to encourage them to come back into the fold to work on any issues that may have prompted them to drop out.
some with success with others i have not been so lucky. what i have noticed that those that are committed to the goals and the service of the organization are not so hard to convince as the others who were only interested in getting into parties for free.
so what can you say to a grown person who has chosen to not be a part of an organization that you both worked hard to build? you can give them a speech about the founders and their struggles and harken back to the hardest moments on line and how you pulled through...together as a team as a family. you can remind them of the process and how fun but how difficult it was. and you can give them some tough love...like...
"hey someone got denied membership who might be a little more into this than you! think about how privileged and lucky you are to have this?! some people dream their whole lives to have this and you are just throwing it all away!"
*of course that tactic might not work*
some of the issues that you listed can be worked on...
-financial: maybe the sisters can get together and figure out a way to help with the absent sister's costs
-bitterness: maybe there needs to be a nice long b**ching session
but the selfishness thing...well for the most part those are the people who just did it for the perks. and unless someone can convince them otherwise...there is little that can be done. maybe as they grow older and wiser they will see the mistakes in their ways.
overall...its important that before one "disses" a sister or brother that there is a conversation that is to be had. sometimes communication can bring out some issues that have been overlooked or bring out some feelings that have been held in check for too long and need to come out.
the important thing is communicate then decide whether this person is someone who is just down on their luck or is just a "t-shirt wearer"
peace