You know you are in a black Chuch
...When they have an African Attire fashion show inside the church during Black history month (also all during Black History month the urshers have on kente cloth).
...When an elder of the chuch starts off the service by saying "I know you all didn't think we were going to have church in here today. Stand up we finna have CHUCH" and everyone stands up and starts shouting.
...When after church the kids are making fun of the adults who caught the holy ghost and an adult sees them and can tell just by the shouting technique who the kids are mocking. Then the adult says, "Stop picking on Ms. Mary, God don't like that." One question how did you know they were picking on Ms. Mary...you know you thought Ms. Mary's shouting was out there too.:0
...When the old men in the church try to outdo each other and show up in lime green suits, with matching hats, canes, shoes, hankerchiefs, and just KNOW they are on point. Worst of all the ladies of the chuch either approach him or congregate outside the chuch and say "Babyface was sho' lookin' fine dis Sunday."
...When the minister's previous and current wife all attend the same chuch.
...When service doesn't let out until 3:30 and you have to return for a night service starts at 6:00
...When a chuch member use their vehicle to sell items after chuch service has let out. I.e. hot sausages, pickle eggs, chips, sodas, cut up cucumbers with vinegar, and a load of other high blood pressure goodies.
...When during praise and worship everyone starts yelling "the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire, we don't need no water.." you know how it goes.
...When the pastor threatens to place a list of people who didn't pay their tithes in a public area in the chuch.
...When the chuch has pageants to "battle" the fashion styles of its members with members of other chuches. I.e. "The Hattitude" a hat modeling fashion show...whoever wins gets bragging rights until the next year.
...When there is a loud mouth in the chuch who tells everybody's business.
...When there is a chuch family dinner after service and after everyone has had atleast one plate the big bellied deacons send kids to get them some more food so they won't be embarrassed and the kids end up going to the servers and loudly say, "Deacon Smith say he won't some mo' colla' greens, pigeon peas, and smothered poke chops"
...When either the elders, members, preachers, or choir members sons are in jail and they stand up in chuch and say, "please pray for my son, he got locked up again fo snatching purses."
HC this is post is getting long and I still have other things I can say....tsk...I think I'll end here for now