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The way I see it, there are three sides to every story. With divorce somes he said/ she said... the truth lies in the middle.
You will never know you friend's true situation -- it's not your life. I'm very sorry to hear that she has to go through this.
I have been divorced. Most people we knew thought we were a happy couple who just had the problems that come along with married life. Very few actually saw how our life together unfolded, and those who did were not aware of everything wrong between us. In the end, it was my decision to move on, and I am a much stronger person because I chose to end the marriage.
Divorce is never an easy thing, but in many cases can be in the best interest of both parties -- and children involved. What is most important when there are children is that the adults realize they have to be civil. They don't have to like each other, but they do need to work at getting along so the children don't become pawns in some sick game.
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