Oh sweet Moxie...
I'm so sorry to hear about this-MOST of all because you are in pain. The stories you hear on this board can yank your heart out.
You are in very good company. Considering your reasons and the way you two handled it, it reminded me of a little saying. (Doesn't EVERYTHING?
)
"Love is like sand: If you grasp it too tightly, it
slips through your fingers. But, if you hold it just
right, it will stay there forever."
You have left the door open.