[AKA_Monet]

Fortunately for me, my husband and I did a Civil Ceremony in May 16, 2003.

Now we will be having a Religious Ceremony in Sedona, Arizona on July 2, 2003. Yes, during the week right before July 4th in the heat...

My mom and I rapidly sent out invitations to very close friends and family. Interestingly my family with whom I am the closest flaked out on me and said they will be sending me money... My mom just told HER friends and they gonna crash are the wedding. My husband is not close with his extended family so RSVP-ing for him was not an issue.

I think it was 'cuz Sedona is an out of way place--kinna like a "destination wedding" and only true to real folks would show up and that way, they RSVP... Email and phone is working for us... And both of us sent invites to at least 50 people. And we're at 40 something. The dinner we are having asked to give the final count in 2-3 days--I dunno--my mom's in charge of dat...

If my mom decides to have a Reception in my hometown, where we know there could easily be 200+ people, I told my mom to just do heavy hors d'ouvres with ice sculptures--a true Reception--not a sit down dinner. In fact the hotel in Sedona is charging us $3.00 per slice to cut our wedding cake!!! So that gets expensive for negroes to NOT RSVP for a skerious sit down dinner type reception!!! Besides, since I'm almost 35, I don't need all the fancy-smancy formal stuh that y'all youngins need... Sometimes too many of my friends have had one too many chicken dinners if you know what I mean...

What you could do is set up your seating arrangements for your guest who have RSVP'ed. Set aside your "family" area tables. Usually, the hotel cooks 10% more plates based on your final count... Make like 2-4% of those plates vegetarian on the safe side... And do not count on the hotel not charging you for extras if you need them--set up a contengency and several back up plans.

You need to have your girlfriends that are helping with the guest book be in charge of seating for non-family related guests... You need at least 4 friends to do that. Usually a cool cousin will help you or an auntie that will be ready to work...

Sometimes, your registry lists folks who have purchased items from your list... Even if they give you a number of items purchased, it can give you an idea of how many folks will be coming. And maybe deduct at least 2-3% of that from that number based on the cost of the reception dinner per item purchased.

Lastly, take a breath, get a massage and remember the real reason you are doing all of this--for you and your future husband!!!

Congratulations!!!