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and was basically told to shut up and accept what I was told - and I realized that Catholicism doesn't exactly encourage questions and debate.
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i am so with you on that one!!! i went to catholic school from k thru 8th grade. in the 3rd grade, we always had to talk about the gospel and homily on mondays. i didn't go to church bc my parents didn't take me. i was 8, was i supposed to hotwire the car and drive myself? well, one monday, i was called on to answer the questions. i had no idea, but i guessed...there are only 4 people who wrote the gospels....lol. the nun figures out that i am only guessing and asks why i didn't go to church. i explain that no one took me. she said that i should tell my parents that i have to go and she proceeded to tell me that if they didn't take me i should take myself. i should walk if i had to bc it was that important to go to church. since i lived 3 miles away from the nearest church, i really didn't think it would be appropriate to walk all by myself!!! did she even think about the safety of an 8 yro walking all that way alone (and she did know where i lived)?
in 5th grade, we were talking about how the isrealites were the "chosen" people and how only they would go to heaven...then at the same time, we were saying how only catholics would go to heaven...so i wanted an explanation. i was basically told by a nun that it just was so there, stop asking. at this point, i was a little wary.
in the 8th grade, i really and truly ended my belief in the catholic church. my teacher that year, a nun, was awesome. she was soooo "cool." one day in health class, we got on the topic of sex and abortion. someone asked if abortion was ok if the woman was raped. she said (and i am COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY NOT LYING) that god would never allow a women to get pregnant unless she enjoyed it. i almost fell out of my chair. to this day, i get totally aggrevated when i think of this. given the statistics that 1 out of 4 women get raped at one point in her lifetime.........i am so angry that this woman would stand in front of a group of children and say this.
in the area that i grew up in, first confession and communion were in grade 2. confirmation occured in each church every three years for 6-8 graders. i was supposed to receive confirmation in the 8th grade, but i switched schools and the new school had confirmation the previous spring. i thought i had escaped, but my mom made me get confirmed at our church. i was in the 10th grade and i even said that i really didn't want to be confirmed and it wasn't what i believed in. it was terrible! my parents aren't even religious!!!
in 2000, my nephew was born and his parents asked me to be his godmother. my mom had arranged his baptism and the priest said that he just needed a letter from my parish priest saying that i was "eligible." my mom lied and said that since i had just moved to massachuettes that i didn't belong to a church yet! the priest said that as soon as i joined one, that i could ask the priest to fill out the appropriate paperwork. i was pissed off!!!!! my sis-in-law's twin brothers were asked to be the godfathers and they couldn't do it either bc they didn't belong to a church. my parents had to stand in as the "official" godparents. my mom got the priest to agree to allow the three of us to stand up at the baptismal fountain, too, but we would not be noted as the god parents. do you want to hear the absolute worst part of this story......my parents do not go to church.....ever. i think the last time my mom went for a mass, without some special reason, was when i was 5. guess what....they write a check out every year for their "church dues." so it really doesn't matter if you are a fit person, just one who pays.
currently, i am a "maria-ist." basically, i believe that there is a higher something, that you should be a good person, treat others well, etc. i do not believe that religion occurs in a building and that you are religious if you go to church/temple/synagoge once per week and then forget the rest of the of the week the teachings of the religion. i am drawn to judaism, but i don't know that i will ever convert. who knows, maybe i will always just be a "maria-ist."