I decided to kill the perm that was killing my hair and body
my sophomore year of college. Why? well I was watching some little girls, I can't remember who they were, but they were black and were playing house. While they were playing, they put slips and blankets on their head to cover up their own hair. They were playing like they had long straight hair.
Now I used to do the same thing, but it REALLY bothered me. Most people in my family are natural so I was the one "holding it down" for the permed heads. But then I thought about my daughter (future, hypothetical daughter) and asked myself how I would feel if she asked me about straightening her hair...
Here I was this "pro-black freedom fighter", but I realized at that moment that I had an issue: at that time, I could not see myself as beautiful, the way God made me. Now I do NOT have self esteem issues (unless too much esteem is a problem
. so for me to realize that the very CONCEPT of me being beautiful the way I was created was something I had issue with, REALLY upset me. After a few months of going back and forth, I finally realized that this s*&^ had to go. And I have been perm free ever since.
Now, admittedly, I could be a pro-black freedom fighter w/ a perm; conversely, NOT having a perm in no way assures one of being "conscious". But for me, it was very hypocritical to uphold the idea that "Black is beautiful" when I didn't truly KNOW for myself that it was or even could be.
Going natural has been a very spiritual experience for me as well. Simple things like, I LOVE standing in the shower, washing my hair and feeling it exploding all over my head--that may sound odd to some, but I'm trying to explain a feeling here, and that is difficult.
There were no other natural heads at my school when I made the switch; at least if there were, I didn't see them (I went to school in central Pennsylvania, black population was small, so I expect that I would have known them!
) and that was hard. I really wish I'd had this thread when I first started.
And you're right, they aren't testing, or planning to test perms...and they really should. I do know that women are advised to leave the perm alone during pregnancy...which in a way begs some questions: if it's harmful to the baby for you to perm during pregnancy, wouldn't it still harmful for you to breast feed while perming? or better yet, if it's harmful to babies, at what age is it no longer harmful? seven? eight? 20 something? ever?
Now I'm on a roll
. If we know that perm chemicals can harm us physically, is it really a stretch to wonder how it impedes our mental capacity, ability (it does go on our heads afterall)? If you didn't know whether or not a box of cereal contained chemicals that cause life long negative effects on your daughter or not, would you still let her eat it in the morning on her way to school? Just something to think about.
[This message has been edited by 1 Woman of Virtue (edited January 25, 2001).]