Well, I must say that I find it interesting that this person has contacted you about this after so many years. Clearly, this issue must have deeply affected his memories and experiences of college and his time with the chapter.
In a way, I'm wondering why he has such deep issues with this. It's as if he used this particular situation as a scapegoat for other problems he had/has in his life.
However, that's not what's in front of you right now. What's in front of you is one of your *brothers* telling you he has or "had" a very serious problem with you as person.
So, you ask, what is the adult thing to do? I say, reply to his message in the most mature, polite and brotherly manner possible. He's expecting you to not reply, thus you need to reply to prove that wrong. Why? I think it would be better to show that you're man enough and care enough to reply. Plus, if this somehow gets out of hand (the news of this drama breaks out to others), you can prove that you "tried your best" to make things right with him.
You don't have to say much, just a paragraph along the lines of:
"I'm sorry that you feel this way and that these feelings have remained with you for so long. I did what I felt was in the best interest of the chapter at the time. I still stand by my convictions; though, looking back, I might have done things differently.
At the end of the day, we're brothers. I extend my goodwill to you."
You know, something like that.
Quote:
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Then, I set in motion a plan to have you expelled from the fraternity. I ran for President.
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Ok, off topic slightly, but what's that about?! It sounds to me as if he's saying that his purpose for running for President was not to further the noble ideals of the fraternity, but rather to have enough power to have you expelled. Eh?????? I'm sorry, but it sounds like it was in the best interest of everyone that this guy wasn't made President.
Best of luck to you. I hope you will be able to make a decision that you feel good about.
.....Kelly
