Serenity_24 and Poplife, I am truly feeling what you both were trying to convey!!!
Someone mentioned what most Black women's responses would be if they found out perms cause cancer...well let's look at that: Any reputable beautician will wear gloves when they apply a perm right? Well there are a lot of reasons for that, but one of the main ones being that the chemicals used in perms are DANGEROUS. Not only do they deteriorate your skin, but (and this is only one school of thought) many believe them to be carcinogenic. Whether that last part is true or not, I don't know...but that's exactly why I would think twice before putting the chemical in my hair...
Anyways...I'd like to add to Poplife's list of questions:
1. Do you perm your hair because you think it's "prettier" straight?
2. When you say you "prefer" straight hair, where does that preference come from? And remember, a preference for something, inherently implies a rejection of something else...
3. Is it really the same to compare White women perming or altering their hair, with Black women who do the same, when WE are the ones who have historically been told that "knappy" hair is ugly, hard to manage, and not beautiful?
4. Have you ever told your self that you don't have the "face" for natural hair?
5. Why do our Black men, even the "conscience" ones, have such a hard time accepting a "natural" head?
6. Why is it that when "permed" sista's see my natural head, they automatically assume I am "Afro-centric"? Whether it's true or not, is that the same as a "natural" head assuming that a sista w/ a perm is not?
7. If you have had a perm since your mother was doing your hair as a little girl, how do you know you could not manage it? (and it doesn't count if you can't comb it when you need a touch up!
Anyone who could handle 2 opposing, connected textures of hair w/o going crazy has my respect!)
8. Why is it that as little girls, most of us longed for long, straight, flowing hair? Remember playing house and putting a blanket, sheet, or slip on your head so you could flip it over your shoulder, pretending it was your hair? Where does that come from?
9. Finally (yes, I'm almost done
) Why is it that when I graduated, I was told by nearly EVERYONE of my gurl's w/ perms that my hair was not professional and I would not get a job w/ "an afro-puff"? Keep in mind this is not an isolated incident, and many "natural" heads experience the samething!!
I think this is an important issue, because in many cases, it speaks directly to a Black woman's self esteem. While many of us on this forum are secure in who we are, take a look around and see how many of us feel ugly, or unloved because we are told that by the media (both white and some black!), family members, and our Black men. Talk to any group of sista's and see how many of them place an emphasis on beauty being tied to hair...more specifically, straight/"good" hair...
Peace is not the absence of trouble, but the presence of God...