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Killarny...
Either you're the lost sister I never knew about, OR, your inlaws and my parents are related somehow.
My advice, based on 12 years of marriage - STAY AWAY, STAY FAR AWAY. The nonverbal message will work.
My parent were such control freaks (I'm an only child too boot) - that my wife rebelled. Rebelled to such a point that I didn't speak to my parents for almost 4 years. We're still trying to reestablish ties, but very cautiously - they tried to run EVERYTHING in our marriage, and I damn near lost my wife in the process.
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