Sexy Mocha...more power to ya! I agree that you should forgive but you can't make youself forget. That is where the problem would come in for me. I would be wondering where he was and questioning his honesty. It is so hard to gain back somone's trust and it takes so long. I just feel that I haven't made a matrimonial commitment to this man...thank God because I can be bad by myself and you get so tired trying to fix things that are broken. The reason I say it is different when you are married is because it is supposed to be for better or for worse...many times there are other factors that enter into a marriage that you don't deal with on a dating level, complicated things. And you can't just bail in the first sign of trouble.
I'm not sayng I'm perfect, because Lord knows, I'm not.
I've cheated on ALL (3)of my boyfriends before I met my husband. (so I don't agree w/ once a cheater, always a cheater) Everyone's reasons are different. Mine were that I got bored easily or the person I was with wasn't the one I truly wanted to be with. In any case, when people cheat, there are usually much deeper things going on in the relaionship,I think.
We all have temptations and needs. More times than not for women it is filling an emotional void where as for men it is physical pleasure. (See my post "Physical cheating or emotional cheating".) My husband is in the Navy, so I hear stories of infidelity al the time. Men going out to sea for six months and their women are temporarly shacked up w/ one their husband's Navy buddies. We all get lonely but when your married I just feel that you need to put deeper thought into it and look to God for strength.
Amen!