Quote:
Originally posted by MTSUGURL
And surprise - if he's a good guy, these aren't unrealistic.
|
hahahaha - just caught this one . . .
Poorly worded; hopefully that was simply insinuating that I'm a dickhead, and not how you truly feel.
Spending time together is a necessary element of a relationship - but in this situation, where the guy lives removed from the girl, it did seem, to my mind, that the girl was primarily pissed b/c he "seems to find time for his friends, and not for me."
Well, SURPRISE! - your guy might certainly value his friends more than you, at the start of a relationship, if he's a "good guy" and well-adjusted. This is NOT a bad thing - this shows that he values the time and energy he puts into maintaining his close relationships with other people who value him in the same way.
This bodes well for the girlfriend - first of all, the girl can step into this reciprocal bond over time, as it is built between him and her. Second, the guy has developed (to a certain extent) those social skills which help when a relationship gets rocky; these may not be polished, but they are at least nascent in his personality.
The downside would be potential insulation of his feelings and views - sort of like what happens on this message board, come to think of it . . .
Anyway, it's not as much of a downside, or an element of being a "bad guy", as I think some are making it out to be. Personally, I would prefer a girl to tell me she was going out with her friends, especially early on in a relationship, rather than cutting them out to be with me - while it would be flattering at first, after about 10 weeks I would think it to be getting old, or indicative of a nature I'm not into.
Again, no offense meant to you, MTSUGURL, or to AlphaSigLana - hopefully this is enlightening as to how guys think, and where my earlier post came from.