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I hated my roommate from first year. The place would be constantly trashed, they would smoke in there, and would just make life horrible for me. Add to this that the ass was a large dude.
Well there were a string of incidences that really irked me. One night i got home and i smell something bad. For those of you that have been on the subway in NY you know the smell. It's that disgusting urine smell. I had no idea what was going on. I find the other roommate (who was messy but not disgusting) who tells me to look in the bathroom. The bathroom is covered in newspaper. Yeah, you might be guessing it by now. The freak hick had pissed all over the bathroom and newspapers were put on the floor to absorb it. The newspapers weren't thrown out for 3 days. The kid was a frigging gerbil or something and the bathroom turned into his little cage with newspapers.
Another time I finally decide to use the shower in our place after like a month. I was essentially living with my girlfriend at the time and would rather deal with flowery soap than dirty bathroom. I get out of the shower and my foot is itching. When I wake up, my foot is all puffy. I have no clue what the hell is going on. I'm way too embarassed to tell anyone so I just suck it up and put on my sneakers. Well after loosening up one sneaker, it looked like my foot was about twice as large as yesterday. I have the most painful walk to class after I decide to "walk it off" and i'm sitting there in class constantly scratching my enlarged foot until it just starts to burn. I freak out and hobble over to the hospital. The nurse freaks out when she sees it and they bring me some sort of "specialist" who claims I have some strange heart disorder. Finally they figure out I'm just allergic to something and the something is mold. Yeah, I stepped in some sort of fungus colony in the bath tub. I never used that bathroom again.
Then there was the time that i bring a girl up into my bed (top bunk). She's about to get off the bed and falls over something on his chair and starts saying something about how she was all "wet". I'm thinking she's still horny and then i remember something; hick boy keeps a spit cup because he constantly spits up liquids of various colors of the rainbow. I can never again get with this girl because i know this and i break the news to her when i take her back to her room.
Then there was the porn found on my computer. We're not talking your run of the mill kind of porn. We're talking pregnant lady, old lady, and even rape porn. I start to freak out even more. I put a password on my computer. This causes him great distress as he pulls a knife on me that night. He relents but only to play hank williams jr. all day every day for the next 2 weeks. The only reason he stops is because i take his cd player apart and unhook a few wires.
-Rudey
--Did I mention I was put on housing probation for punching him at the end of the year?
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