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Old 02-21-2003, 04:13 PM
AXOLiz AXOLiz is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 220
Quote:
Originally posted by FuzzieAlum
I think it's different when it's your brother, who you've spent your whole life with, than when it's just someone you know. It's usually a silly statement, because race is one of the first things we notice about a person, and to pretend you don't is a little hypocritical. Now if it's your brother, you probably mostly think of his as your hero or a pain in the arse, even if he's a purple man from Mars.

To say you think of a person as your sorority sister/roommate/co-worker before you think of them as [insert race here] is one thing, as I don't think any of us want to be defined race-first - but to say that you somehow managed to never even notice their race (and somehow assumed they were the same race as you) strikes me as such a strenuous attempt to pretend that race doesn't matter that it's obvious that race does matter. It's implying that X race is somehow different from your race, and it also implies that that person has "risen above" their race to be like yours.
For the record (and I'm not saying you're talking about me personally, I just don't want to be misunderstood), I wasn't saying that I don't notice race. I think everyone does when they meet someone, just like you notice hair color, body type, etc. But after I've personally developed a relationship with someone, it's not one of the first things that pop into my head when thinking about that person. If someone else asks me to describe that person physically, I mention it, but if I'm just talking about the person, I don't say their race/religion/sexual orientation/etc. unless it has some bearing on the story I'm telling.

The girl saying she never noticed her brother's race was also 12 or so when she said that...considering her age, I thought it was a fairly wise, and heartfelt, statement.