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Blair and justamom- you said it!!!
Wow, James I am really impressed with the lack of morality that you have! Go find yourself some values!
He would be crossing an ethical line if he knowingly and willingly slept with a married woman, no matter her decision. It takes two to tango, and both parties would be at fault for decit and adultry. He would not, in my opinion, be "less at fault" either-- he just doesn't have to face the consequences of a broken marriage. You also ask to whom this guy has a commitment. I'd say he has one to himself. How can you really think yourself a good person if you decide not to take yourself out of a situation where you will break up a marriage????? You could reason that they shouldn't be together, but if that is the case, she must decide based on her relationship with her husband itself, not by comparison with another realtionship, that divorce is what she wants.
Marriages end in divorce a lot, for all sorts of reasons, but does that make a promise or a commitment any less important? No.
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