Haha, James, thanks for the offer, but I got it taken care of myself!
I'll call you next time, though...
KillarneyRose, thanks for the suggestion--it helped! The zipper still doesn't work quite like it ought to, but at least I was able to get it zipped so that my knickers weren't on display for the entire chapter.
This was my last initiation so I think I'll retire that dress...