[Firehouse]

I really admire a lot of your insights. This topic about fraternity unity has a lot to do with the way men think, as opposed to the way women think. For instance, we have nothing even comparable to the alumni PanHellenic meetings/luncheons that sorority alumni have.
But here's the story, and I think you'll get a grin out of it. There was a meeting here about a year ago to plan a new fraternity row. Each fraternity had two or three alumni in the room. There were about three dozen men altogether, and everyone was over forty. There was a lot of good natured banter, and everyone was enthusiastic about the work at hand. In fact, the thing got so lively and upbeat that one man stood up and suggested that instead of each fraternity operating their own kitchen, we build one large dining hall and all the undergrads could eat together in the evening, at their own separate sets of tables of course.
No one said anything. Then, the leader stood up and said, "With respect, I just don't think that's a good idea. You know," he smiled as he went on, "When we all in school, we didn't like each other very much...and [our] kids today don't like each other very much either." Everyone laughed and applauded. We're all adults now, all friends now, and we all remember our rivalries fondly. Those were great days. The point is: 18, 19, 20-year-old men who are aggressive and ambitious aren't likely to be thinking in terms of the ideals of interfraternalism. That's why it is so important for mature, responsible ALUMNI to work closely with the male chapters.