[Kimmie1913]

Originally posted by Love_Spell_6


Well of course, when a man/woman makes the choice to have a child out of wedlock, there are going to be consequences. Consequences are an absentee father, likely living near the poverty line because of only one income, and not being able to provide adequate parental guidance.

I know many women that overcome their circumstances by taking on the role of a maternal and paternal figure. I think if a person finds themselves in this situation, they need to accept that they are in the situation because they put themselve there, and understand that they MUST work twice as hard to raise their children in a positive environment with moral parental guidance. Meaning, working two jobs if necessary to make sure their children go to a good school, try to live in a neighborhood where the crime rate is low, make sure their children are involved with groups such as Big Brothers/Big Sisters, and the many other positive groups that reach out to disadvantaged children. The parent also has to make sure they know who their children are hanging out with and where they're hanging out. I think the parent also has to accept that they have to put some of their needs on hold (i.e. clubbing, dating, etc) for the child. Having all types of different men/women around your child OR always putting your kids off on grandma so you can go clubbin is not responsible parenting IMO

These things name a few suggestions I would have to someone in the hypothetical situation you mentioned. Most of what I said involves good parenting skills and just taking an active role in your children's life.

And although this is not the topic of the thread......
Thank you for the link, but I still feel that welfare DOES aid immoral lifestyles. Any program that continually gives $$ to someone for being irresponsible... (having 5 children by 5 different people with no way to support them...)is aiding immorality. ANd also, everybody's morals are different.

And for those who are doing right by the system, i.e. to get back on their feet....that's good for them, but I'm talking about the large numbers of people that abuse the system and use the system as a crutch.

ANd for the record, if student loans are welfare, when does the grace period end before WELFARE RECIPIENTS have to start paying their money back? Just curious, because mine is 6 months for my student LOANS.

Well, when a father is absent, if the government catches up to him, he will be ordered to repay the money paid out to supprt his children through TANF. They do not routinely sek repayment in other circumstances, to my knowledge.