Umm....
Whatever happened to personal responsibility? Why is a man "forced" to cheat on his woman? If she is so insecure, nagging, etc., why doesn't he either sit her down and work that out, or LEAVE?
It is beyond lame to suggest that the person cheated on caused the behavior of the cheater. We all make decisions of our own free will, and if we choose to stay in bad relationships, we still must abide by the guidelines established in the beginning (fidelity, trust, etc.). If not, it's pretty chumpish to blame our actions on another. I mean, if I go upside your head, can I blame you for making me mad-"driving me to it"? If I eat your dessert that you left on the table when you excused yourself to the restroom, can I say you left me no choice, leaving that luscious brownie out there for me to stare at? If I hit your car when backing out of a parking space, can I absolve myself of responsibility/guilt by saying "you shouldn't have parked your car there; you knew it was dangerous"? Where do we draw the line and accept that we do things because we WANT to (like cheating).
What did Cedric the Entertainer say in "Kings of Comedy"? Something about black folk living off of the "Wish Principle"? I WISH my husband WOULD use a lame-butt excuse like that! He wouldn't be gone because of the cheating, he'd be gone because of the stupidity of forming his mouth to say some mess like "your nagging, etc. FORCED me to cheat."
Keeping your man/woman happy at home should be something you WANT to do because you love them, not something you feel threatened to do so they won't cheat. What if you're doing "everything right," and they still cheat? What lie do you come up with then????
And a postscript: Intensify, if these men are turning to women who "have enough sense to know..." then why are they stupid enough to mess around with someone who is cheating on their woman?
[This message has been edited by Discogoddess (edited September 11, 2000).]
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