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well, maybe hazing in the extreme sense doesn't work (with which i whole-heartedly agree), but perhaps the current definition of hazing doesn't work either. maybe the current definition was made as a knee-jerk reaction to all of the extreme hazing that has caused people to die and to law suits. is there some in between?
i joined my chapter because it was the only one on my campus that didn't haze. i will never befriend anyone who has mistreated me. we had a marshmallow roast and movie nights, and phi meetings where we learned things, such as the greek alphabet and the creed. as phis, we were supposed to wear our pledge pins during waking hours, unless we were showering (or on our way to the shower), at a party, during sports practices or any time it was inappropriate (an off campus job, etc). i thought that was fine! some pledges (and that is what all of the other chapters called their new members) had to put their pin on their robes when they were in the shower...how silly. if i forgot to wear my pin, it was no big deal. if women in the other sororities forgot their's they would get bigger pins to "teach them a lesson." that is a perfect example of how a small thing can be turned into something harmful. one minute you are showing pride of being in an organization....and the next minute you are being embarassed in public.
so how do we improve the definition so that it still allows you to learn about your org, show pride in the group, and become friends with the people in your chapter? perhaps educating existing members on how to develop nm programs that focus on positive behaviors, how quickly things can be taken from good to bad, and how to set limits with chapter members to ensure that no one takes things past the limits. the new members should receive education (preferably not from a chapter member, maybe as a part of rush orientation or from alums) that there are certain things that are expected as a member of a greek organization....showing pride by wearing your pin, learning history, etc and that there are lines that will not be crossed by current members, but that nms are expected to do their part, too.
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