[ZetaLuvBunny]

"Congratulations to Saddam Hussein on being elected to another seven-year term. It was very close. He received 99 percent of the vote, and one percent of the vote went for last-minute candidate Frank Lautenberg." —David Letterman

"Robert Torricelli, a powerful fund-raiser who helped raise more than $100 million for the Democratic party, took inappropriate gifts from a businessman, including an $8,000 gold Rolex watch, for which he was severely admonished by the Senate Ethics Committee in July. To recap: raising $100 million in contributions from gigantic corporations — ethical; taking a watch — unethical. That's the Senate Ethics Committee, an oxymoron since 1974." —Jon Stewart

"Al Gore asked Americans this week, 'Are you better today than you were two years ago?' And in Florida voters said, we don't understand the question, we're confused." —Jay Leno

"Before we bring democracy to Iraq or Afghanistan, it might be prudent to bring it to Florida. We don't have to bring regime change to the whole state. We can start bombing in Pensacola and work our way down." —Jon Stewart, on Florida's latest voting fiasco

"Janet Reno lost the democratic primary. When asked about it, Reno said, 'I feel like I've been kicked in the nuts.'" —Conan O'Brien

"Janet Reno lost the primary election for governor down there in Florida. They think what hurt her were the allegations of steroid abuse." —David Letterman

"This weekend big doings down in Florida. Former Attorney General Janet Reno is hosting a dance party at a Miami night club. Not only is she the guest of honor, she is also the bouncer." —David Letterman