Hey Mikki!
I quasi-responded to some of your concerns in the "advice to rushees" thread.
I think one of the things to remember is that in the thread you commented on, it was written by SOUTHERN theta. Rush at southern & big midwestern schools is a whole different animal then at a smaller northern or western school.
Your school/Greek life sounds a lot like mine was. During rush, cocktail dresses never appeared, and the one time we got a reccommendation the collective response was "Duh?"
Remember also...a lot of these prospectives are just out of high school, and some of them have not even had a college class yet. How you could have any idea what to expect or do in rush, I haven't the faintest...but expounding on that is a topic for another day. (condescending generalization ahead) At that age, I would have been aksing the "what to wear" questions too.
One way of rush isn't "good" and one isn't "bad"...they're just different.