[FuzzieAlum]

Sigmagrrl, you're very right on all your points. I know a lot of terrific guys ... they're smart, they're funny, they're decent human beings, they look good (your mileage may vary depending on taste). No, I'm not dating them because we wouldn't suit each other. They don't want to date me either.

I have a friend who is perennially single. She always falls for gay men. She's even come out and admitted it's a form of avoidance - she doesn't have to worry about rejection because she knows up front she's out of contention but it's not "personal."

I don't know how guys do it. The thought of asking a guy out terrifies me. But I expect them to ask me out! It takes guts (well, in the case of a few guys, a thickheaded refusal to admit that there aren't any women out of their league).

But still ... I think more men than women are hung up on looks. We women are hung up on other, equally superficial things, so I'm not saying we are superior. But guys' "minimal hotness standard" is generally way higher than womens'. When they grow up, though, and are ready to get serious, they'll probably end up with a woman who isn't as stereotypically babelicious as they always expected - unless they are actually that babelicious themselves.