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Anyway, it's much more fun to talk about what closet freaks we all are. Who here enjoys bondage, anyway? 
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The other thing I have to say on the fupa subject is that I've more or less given up trying to have a teenage body. I look back at pictures of myself in early high school and I say, "I wish I were as thin as I was back when I thought I was fat." I sometimes get depressed about it, like last year when I was teaching high school and it was starting to be summer. I was walking through this school full of half-naked girls and thinking, "I used to have a 23-inch waist, I swear!" But then I realized that those girls aren't healthy. I'm trying to lose weight right now, but I know I'll never get back to where I was. And that's fine. I'm doing it because I want to feel better (physically-- my mental image is fine). I remember what it felt like when I was in shape, and I miss that. But losing weight or otherwise changing myself for a guy? Hell no! I'm at the point in life where I'm starting to glance around for the person with whom I'll spend the rest of my life. And that means, eventually, the person with whom I'll get old and nasty and wrinkled and have old-people sex. And if he's upset about a little future fupa now, I shudder to think what he'll say when I'm shrunken and gray.