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I think the problem many people have with "frat" is that it's used in a derogatory way. "Oh, I don't go to Pioneer Square, too many frat boys in white baseball caps"; "There was more alcohol at that party than at a kegger at the frat house"; "YOU'RE a frat boy? But you seem so nice!" It is generally not used by members of fraternities.
On the other hand, "Sammy," "Delt," "SigEp" are all used by members of those organizations. Then there are nicknames that might seem reasonable to an outsider but are objected to by the groups themselves - don't call a Sigma Sigma Sigma a tri-Sig, for example. And AXD's national policy is against the nickname "Fuzzies," but there are chapters that use it (and chapters that hate it). I think it's just a matter of respecting their desires. It's like knowing a guy named Robert who hates being called "Bob."
The "country" thing is an attempt at humor, but it's not really parallel. By that argument, it isn't appropriate to nickname anything! We call our country "America," after all, and that's a nickname, too.
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Alpha Xi Delta
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