I'm just trippin' off of the replies.
This is a great topic. It's good to read other people's points of view on topics such as this.
Anyway, I wanted to add that I've noticed that my clients show me ALL of the respect that I'm due because I put all of the cards on the table when I make my FIRST visit. In addition to that, I do EXACTLY what I say that I'm going to do with them. For example, if they feel that they don't want to comply, I let them be non-compliant. BUT...when we get in front of the JUDGE (because most of them are on probation), I give the judge the "real" deal. I hold them...yes, even the younger ones...accountable for their own behavior. KIDS NEED DISCIPLINE AND STRUCTURE!!!! It's funny and they won't say it, but they actually feel neglected, misunderstood, and unattended to whenever they DON'T have those two components in their lives. In my opinion, there's just NO excuse for a parent not being able to manage an 8, 10, 12 year-old's behavior. I just don't understand HOW in the WORLD an 8 or 9 year-old NOT go to school or stay out until "wee" hours of the night? Will SOMEONE help me with that? I'm telling you, THIS is what I deal with on a daily basis. Not in my OWN home, but in dealing with my clients and their families. MY daughter is about to turn 9 years old. And if she or my son, who is 3 years old, EVER....EVER...EVER told me that they weren't going to go to school or some MESS like that, I'm telling you, the Department of Social Services would PROBABLY be called because I would tear their rumps to shreds. I don't EXPECT my daughter to understand WHY we do or require that she do certain things. And, in all honesty, I don't feel OBLIGATED to explain EVERYTHING either. My children mean EVERYTHING to me and I TELL them and SHOW them EVERY DAY. I just CAN NOT see my having to go through all of the ups and downs of being a parent and then my kids turn around and give me their a**es to kiss. IT JUST AIN'T HAPPENING IN MY HOUSE!!!!