Quote:
Originally Posted by Phrozen Sands
Fair enough. But y’all do always think y’all can fix dudes. You got a good one and still call yourself polishing up rough edges LOL! I don’t know why chicks do that. Dudes hate that.
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Well, I think a lot of us do fall into the “I can fix him” phase at least once. But the truth is, you can’t fix a guy, you can only support what’s already in him. So like, if a guy already has ambition, discipline, and kindness, smart women will mirror and encourage those things. But if he’s empty or chaotic inside, she can’t plant what isn’t there, although some really dumb ones will try.
There’s a big difference between wanting to change someone and wanting to grow with them. Fixing comes from control. Growth comes from belief.
When I said “polish,” I didn’t mean I was working on a project (guys like that are awful, lol). I meant we both learned how to bring out the best in each other without losing who we already were. The right woman doesn’t rewire a guy, she sharpens what’s already there. That’s the kind of “fixing” I meant. Like refining what was already good or like a clearer version of the same guy. Kind of like nudging him into seeing his strengths instead of doubting them. Know what I mean? That kind of thing.
I just think relationships are about recognition, not reconstruction.