Is there any way you can meet again with your alumna and explain to her why the chapter has made this decision? Regardless of if we're in a local, national, or international sorority we all have those things we strive to attain as outlined in our rituals. Our beliefs are in our rituals, so use them in your explanation. By drawing upon those, can you explain why the chapter has made the choice it has so she will better understand the decision? She may not want to hear it and may not agree, but hopefully she will understand if approached in this manner.
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Our bi-laws say nothing about us having to give bids to legacies and as far as I know it is only a courtesy.
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Hopefully your chapter does annual bylaws reviews. Please consider addressing this in your next bylaws revision. If it's happened once, it could happen again. With a legacy policy in place for your sorority you hopefully could avoid some of this pain in the future.
Best of luck to you and your sisters. I hope you keep making decisions that are best for you and your sorority's ideals!
Fraternally,
Christin