[SigmaCat]

I think lots of guidance is fine - I know I wish I'd had more before I rushed. I think it's GOOD if knowledgeable parents and friends are providing good advice about proceeding through the experience - what to avoid, how to showcase strengths, &c. I'm okay with them putting out feelers about recs, too. If you want to make the most of the opportunity, it's an all-hands-on-deck situation and everybody should pool resources to help. That said, the endeavor should be primarily driven by the student. It's not okay for parents to hijack the process by doing the student's applications for her, collecting references alone and without the student's participation, dictating every last detail regarding clothing/makeup/hair/conversation, and stalking her through recruitment to make sure she makes the "right" choices. There's a difference between making sure the student knows what she's up against and has all the tools she needs to maximize her options on one hand, and rushing by proxy through one's child on the other.