Quote:
Originally Posted by NerdyGreek
When recruitment ends and the advice freely being given out is, "Nobody likes their house at first; you'll learn to like it" I feel like something has to change.
My daughter is contemplating de-pledging. So are many of her friends. She's talked to about a dozen girls she was friends with going into rush. Two got into sororities they actually wanted. The other ~10 got bids for houses they didn't like. We're not talking 2nd choices; we're talking houses that were low on the pref lists after the first two rounds. One of her friends has to de-pledge because she got a bid for one of the most expensive sororities - and she can't afford it. (It's over $1000/year more than the one my daughter is in.)
I blame variable quota and RFM. Girls are dropped left and right early on, and are forbidden from dropping houses (they can only rank) which is how you end up with girls in houses they can't afford. Then you have situations like one of D's friends who was dropped by all the houses except ABC because her sister was an ABC at the school. No one asked her if she liked her sister and wanted to be in the same sorority with her. (The answer would have been "no.") It's only the second year of using this combo and I've got to question whether it's the right thing to be doing. I feel like the effort to even house sizes and maximize the number of bids given out is creating artificial groupings of girls who have surviving the process as the sole thing they have in common.
I'm wondering if anyone else involved with a school that uses variable quota and RFM has seen problems with retention?
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Nerdy Greek, I know exactly what campus you are talking about. Bid day was 1 short week ago. ONE FRIGGING WEEK.
If you, your daughter or her friends are already questioning the chapter that she pledged, I don't even know what to say. It takes longer than that to get to know people in a chapter of 400 girls. It takes longer than that to develop friendships and bonds. She doesn't even know their names yet and she doesn't like them or thinks they have nothing in common with her? Did these girls think closeness just happened magically?
Your daughter had choices to make. In the end after Pref, she had the choice to accept a bid and sign the MRABA, knowing the chapters that wanted her or not sign it. Now her choice is this:
1. quit and remain without a sorority experience at her current University. She can always transfer to another University and try again, right?
2. work to make friends in her chapter and enjoy the experience.
Don't even start asking about rushing again next year as a sophomore who quit her sorority. Ain't gonna happen on this campus. If she is pining for a chapter that she did not get a bid from, that is a real shame because she is turning her back on the chapter that wanted her.