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We had one of these last year. One of my alum sisters was presented with a packet (she hadn't been asked if she would write a rec letter, by the way), and called me to clarify a few resume points, since the PNM and my daughter had shared a few classes senior year. There were several embellishments on the resume, and between those, the lack of grace in requesting a letter, and their interactions when Alum had been a long-term substitute teacher for one of the girl's classes, Alum and I went back and forth for a couple of weeks over whether to ignore her request, write a non-recommendation letter, or just send the packet with a reference form and let her sink or swim. She ultimately chose to write a tepid letter of introduction to enclose with the packet. The reasoning was that the girl was doing ALL of the work on this herself (no help from mom or anyone else, although we would have been happy to help had she asked), and we were probably the only alums she approached who knew that her resume wasn't as factual as it should have been.
During that last decision-making conversation, Alum said, "For some reason, I just don't think that any of this is going to matter. I don't think she's going to end up going through recruitment. I don't know why, though..." Sure enough, the girl ended up not going away to school after all, choosing at the last minute to stay in town and attend a community college.
This is the only resume I'd ever seen in decades of rec-writing that I knew to be embellished, so if it is a common practice, it is one that has slipped by me. I write dozens of letters for girls from our neighborhood high school and am very aware of the groups, leadership hierarchies, and honors they list on their resumes. I think contacting her parent regarding the resume is exactly what I would have done, although I might have used the word "questions" in place of "concerns". Either way, I hope that you are able to resolve your issues in a positive way--keep us posted on what happens!
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