There's a bar in Boston that's next door to a club - same owners, I think. You have to be 21+ to go into the bar, but the club's age limits vary by night (sometimes 21+, sometimes 19+, maybe 18+). There's a door connecting the bar directly to the club, and if you're 21+ you can go freely from one to the other. Something like this would be a great option as long as all your friends are old enough to get into the club, but I don't think that type of setup is very common.
I also like the dinner-followed-by-bar idea - I did something like that for my 21st.
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