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Originally Posted by AGDmommy
Just now chiming in. Rough week for my girl. She did go to 3 houses today for pref, 2 of which she consistently ranked last but kept getting invited back because she was cut from the others. She does not feel any connection with them and doesn't want to take up a spot in those houses when she feels that she won't be happy. So...she is suiciding one house, her favorite all week.. I hope that it works for her, I'm so nervous.
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AGDmommy fingers crossed for your daughter! I wish the best for her. I know that Intentional Single Preference is strongly discouraged and at the same time I understand that sometimes it seems like the only option. While I do agree that sometimes "tent talk" and "tiers" plays a role (when I wish it would not, because all the houses have something to offer), I do understand that once in awhile that is not the issue. Sometimes girls just don't feel any sort of connection to a house. While there's a good argument to be made that she could find friends if she went ahead and took a Bid and stuck it out (and it DOES happen!), sorority life is a big commitment and if a girl feels strongly that she'd rather not be in any house at all than be in a particular house, that's the right decision for her. It's a very personal choice.
My heart goes out to all the Moms and their daughters who were released from recruitment, or who dropped out of disappointment. This is such a tough time. When I rushed (many years ago), one of my best friends rushed with me and she dropped out near the end of rush. The next year she went through rush again, with the same result. She was/is, beautiful, intelligent, funny, interesting, an all-around wonderful person with a lot to offer any organization. She's had a successful career and happy family life and continues to be one of my best friends. I remember the heartache she went through and my own frustration at her result, because I knew that she would be a great addition to any sorority.
I hope that none of the freshman girls who didn't get the rush result they wanted will let it define their first year of college.
For those of you whose daughters are thinking ahead to COB, I echo the advice on here for the girls to get to know new sorority members in their dorms. COB placements happen through active members who've befriended someone who would be a good fit for the house. Meanwhile, encourage them to find other ways to get involved, explore all the campus has to offer, and focus on their classes. Whether or not they end up joining a sorority, they will have a good first year at Mizzou if they do that.
And finally, to all the Moms whose daughters attended Preference Round--good luck to your girls! Here's hoping they are all celebrating with their new sisters tomorrow.
All the best.