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Originally Posted by DrPhil
Definitions of manhood and boyhood are fluid.
What is said in theory is often not taught and done in practice. The reality for millions of people is manhood and masculinity are often defined and operated in not so flattering ways and that includes how "military men" have treated each other and treated women. There are and have always been millions of men and women who were taught and truly believe that "real men" are patriarchal, sexist, homophobic, and misogynist. They use biology, religion, and anything else to support the way things are.
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The understood subtext of the letter was to state that mature adult males would not be so crass as demonstrated by the Fox news reporters.
The key concept is level of maturity to differentiate men from boys.
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I would have much rather the letter writers and signers acknowledged/admitted that and then said they are challenging misconceptions about men/manhood/masculinity to get more people to realize what "real men" should and should not do as far as patriarchy, sexism, and misogyny. It is dishonest and untrue to pretend that the Fox News idiots simply missed the "real man memo" when such a "memo" simply does not exist.
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Well, not a written memo per se, but a "memo" in the idea that as we grow up we should be taught how to behave and treat other people regardless of sex, religion, economic level, place of origin, and anything else. Or, what some people would call good manners.