I sincerely am sorry; I know this hurts. Remembering how hard things are and how much is thrown at one at that age, when the frontal lobes are still developing. I do mean that kindly, and I hope that this will work out for you. That is a high price, indeed.
Am feeling a lot of compassion for suffering everywhere. Not jaded - yet.
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"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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