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Originally Posted by Pamt
After round two she was cut. It is very disappointing. She (with permission from the Pi Chi) did visit friends at a Frat house that week. I didn't agree but what can you do? No drinking, no inappropriate behavior of any kind. She visited this house often last year as well; she has two platonic guy friends there and did note some "glares" from sorority sisters as she had a brief relationship with one other guy there.
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Caveat from me: I'm not personally familiar with SEC Greek life and social norms, so I'm just offering the first thing that came to mind here.
Does your daughter get along more easily with men than women? That was kind of the first thing I thought of when I read all of this, especially if there was truly no romantic interest with these men on your daughter's part. I notice that you don't mention anything about sorority friends your daughter made while dating one of the men last year, but the platonic male friends seem to play a dominant role.
There's no judgment either way on who she makes friends with more easily, but it can be an indication of how she has interacted with other women over the lat year. I've seen it with women even in my own chapter in college - they typically had more male friends, and were just much less fluid with navigating all of those female relationship subtleties, which we all can agree are pretty complex sometimes.
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Originally Posted by Pamt
She knew some were envious of the guy she was dating...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pamt
She felt that as she often saw the girls drinking "a lot" that maybe they wouldn't remember she was there with a guy they made no secret of liking. (Wrong)
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I suppose it's possible that some Greek women truly get annoyed when non-Greeks date a popular fraternity man, but I would imagine that a respectful relationship would have allowed your daughter to become friends with the sorority women who were also dating men in that chapter. Those relationships should have been helpful during recruitment. If that didn't happen for whatever reason, I suppose that some of the women could have thought she was aloof or whatnot.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pamt
The platonic ( really good looking) guy made no secret of the fact he really liked her so that didn't help.
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This seems to concern me the most. I've seen plenty of incidents where someone has dated more than one person in the same house, but it's always pretty touchy. Even if your daughter truly just appreciated this guy in a 100% friend capacity, his overtures could really change the way their relationship was perceived to outsiders. And if it was known she wasn't interested, that could spark some disapproval in the way she was handling the situation.
Just my two cents. I'm not sure any of these thoughts will be particularly helpful for your daughter, and I wish you both the best of luck for the next three years!