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Originally Posted by southbymidwest
What a mess.
Unless there is real abuse going on (and sorry, the old "my dad is being so mean he hates my boyfriend, he just doesn't understand" does not constitute abuse in my book), she has chosen to not abide by her parents' rules and has chosen to live as an adult. Fine. She cannot have it both ways, however. No one is owed a college education. There are plenty of kids who had/have to do it on their own for a number of reasons. And yes, the parents may have a college fund like we did, but had our girls decided to not go to college (or culinary school or whatever), then that fund would have become my re-do the kitchen and bathrooms fund.
OF course I say this while remembering the story about the girl at U of Cincinnati whose parents went off the deep end, started tapping her phone and computer, were stalking her, among other bizarre things, and ended up being hit with a restraining order, so you never know.
What bothers me the most though, is that the girl's friend's dad is the lawyer who initiated the lawsuit for her. She and her parents should be working with a counselor to figure it out, he is driving a larger, perhaps insurmountable wedge between her and her parents.
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I was abused by my parents. It annoyed me to no end when I was in high school and other girls would bitch about how horrible their parents were cause of something like you mentioned. No, that is not abuse, that is just parenting.
I think the problem with this issue is that we, at least me, don't really know what is going on. Speaking from experience pretty much everyone who knows my parents will defend them. Growing up I heard, 'Oh, your so lucky to have them as your parents." it was because of this that I did not understand that it was actual abuse. My point, you never know what is going on in someones house.
Do, you think that the friends parents are pressuring her or maybe have convinced the teen to sue her parents?
This topic is kinda of hard for me. I was abused, but also my parents kicked me out at 18 because I did not follow their rules. however, they decided that as their child I had to obey them. And because of this they decided that they wanted grandchildren and that I had to provide them these grandchildren. But, if you talked to my mom about this you would get a complete different story. The way she tells it is that i was an out of control teen who was running wild, disobeying God and doing whatever I wanted. Or my version, I was working and going to community college, planning on transferring to a 4 yr school so I could get away from my parents. My parents version is that I don't need a college education to have a baby so therefor I was disobeying them and God, you know cause I have to obey my parents.
I only say this cause there are ways to spin stories to make the other person sound like the bad person. I do have my own personal view on these things, but as objective as I can be I still don't feel like we know the whole story.
DNP