[SydneyK]

First off, welcome to GreekChat! I always find it refreshing when a new poster is thoughtful and articulate.

Secondly, while I wouldn't assume that your mom would reveal ritual information to you, I find it interesting that you're just now seeing the religious aspect of your sorority. Do you and your mom share the same religion? If so, perhaps you should discuss the issue with her, and ask her if she has any suggestions for how to feel more comfortable with the religious references.

Thirdly, some people simply aren't cut out for sorority life, and you may be one of those people. There's nothing wrong with that at all, and if you think you'll constantly be viewing your membership negatively, it might be best to depledge. You're the only one who can make that decision though, so any comments you receive here should be taken with a grain of salt.

Finally, sorority life as a collegian is a relatively short amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Life as an alum is quite fulfilling, yet isn't as strict (or obviously religious) as collegian life. It may be worth sticking around a while longer to see if you can feel comfortable with your group in order to experience life as an alum.