Hey GreekRegret, I understand your situation as I went through a similar one myself but with a non-panhellenic group. My mother has always wanted me to join a NPHC sorority but for superficial reasons. I at first thought it would be better in the sorority I chose to pledge because she didn't "control" me in college. I joined then realized I didn't fit in as well as I thought I did during my pledge period. I stayed anyway because I assumed I just wasn't giving things a chance. I don't hate being an alumna of the sorority but I do wish I had truly reconsidered my membership when I had the chance. Things have worked out for me to not join a NPHC or NPC sorority but along the way, I've learned a lot about myself and from GC, about sorority membership in general.
I ended up transferring to a new school due to other reasons and am now more focused on bettering myself as a student and woman. I'm joining groups on my new campus and even considering starting a group (once I get stable enough to do so.) I've learned to not regret my choices as they were what I wanted at the time; lessons learned. I hope you are able to find groups on campus that help you realize there are more opportunities to bettering your college experiences than you know! Please reconsider all of the positives in your current situation and look to using them to bettering yourself.
