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Old 08-05-2013, 01:20 AM
Kevin Kevin is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Posts: 18,669
Quote:
Originally Posted by ASTalumna06 View Post
He's not even in this group, and he hasn't yet gone through recruitment.

To the OP: Visit different chapters. Get to know the members. If you click with a group (whether it's your friend's or another), then work hard to get to know them further and try to secure a bid.

I know you've already said you'd join your friends chapter, but you don't know if you'll even like the chapter, and you don't know if the chapter will want you. And what happens if you end up liking another chapter better? Will your friend be offended? I think the two of you shouldn't make promises before you even meet any fraternity members, and you'd be better off telling your friend that you're going to see what your options are and go where you feel most comfortable. If you're not in his chapter, it doesn't mean you can't be friends.

And if you truly don't care what anyone else thinks, then when/if you receive a bid, and you like the chapter (regardless of whether or not it's your friend's chapter), then accept it.
FWIW, I joined a colony of a friend who dropped out of school that same semester. I served in may roles as a collegian, met my wife, have lifelong friends from every single class and am now chapter adviser.

I could have joined another house on campus, had that typical greek experience and been 4 and done. There's a soft place in my heart for 'bottom tier' groups.

That said, there are some nationals (TKE), which would be well advised to close and then reopen defunct chapters under better circumstances. That's the only national I'd steer you clear of though.
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