[MaryPoppins]

Originally Posted by carolkr

I was an AXO at Georgia Tech, and I was clueless about how involved all this rush preparation is and evidently I stumbled through it somehow. Now as my daughter is going to Ole Miss, I realize I am woefully unprepared to assist her.

I have read all the previous year’s information about Ole Miss as well as numerous other postings in general, but I have some stupid questions about the recommendations that I haven’t been able to figure out.

Initially I assumed a recommendation letter was just that – a letter typed on a sheet of paper and written to describe attributes of the PNM. Pretty much like this description on how to write a rec:


But as I discussed the recommendation process with a friend of mine who has written recommendations, she offered to show me a package she received from a PNM to show me what we needed to do when requesting a rec. She protected the person’s personal information, but showed me the basic documents the PNM provided her, and I was surprised to see a 3 page blank sorority recommendation form the PNM included.

While I can appreciate the form provides a consistent format for the sorority to evaluate, it seems the letter would be more personal from someone who really knows the candidate. Yet I followed a link in one of the posts to the University of Alabama guidelines for recommendations, which describes such a letter as ‘letter of support’ and is flatly discouraged.

So will all the recommendations actually be each sorority’s standard form rather than real letters?

What if someone actually sends a letter? My mom’s very close friend is 90 years old, attended UGA, has been active in her sorority her entire life, but I can’t imagine her filling out a form rather than writing a real letter. I know she would write a beautiful recommendation for my daughter, and I was glad to have someone from a SEC school, but will her letter be discounted as a ‘letter of support’?

Sorry for these really basic questions. Thanks for all I have learned through all the posts.

Sometimes the terminology is overwhelming. What used to be universally called "recommendations" or "recs" may also be called "letters of reference" or "references." If one recommendation (reference) has been sent in then other alumnae may send in notes of letters of support. Recently I have learned from a DG, here on GC, that even the non-form letters of support are treated like recs/refs. When I am sending in a letter of reference on a PNM to Theta, I always include a letter in addition to the official letter of reference form, in case someone wants to read my narrative about the PNM. You never know if your PNM might become a star to the Chapter she is rushing.