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If she's a professional woman, she really doesn't give a darn about wearing your letters. Only undergraduate college women think it is cool to wear a men's fraternity shirt in public. So save your breath fighting with the chapter on this, and have the chapter honor her with a special award she can display in her office in addition to her volunteer award from your HQ. Perhaps you can give it to her at a celebratory dinner where the chapter serenades her. Now THAT she would love.
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