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The gifts for my chapter are used at clues (broken up into 3 days of clues leading up for big/little reveal), so I don't think the chapter members would want to have everyone getting the same thing. We do have a "rule" that the first day clue should be just candy, along with a big posterboard that usually has a poem with the clues written out, so that keeps the girls from going all out all the time, but by the 3rd clue, gifts sometimes get pretty extravagant.
I haven't heard much discussion about it in my chapter. I think we are pretty accepting of the fact that some girls have more money to spend or time to make elaborate crafts than others, but if it seems to be affecting a group, then I think having one day where the clues/gifts should be candy, another for letters, and then maybe setting a limit for the last day but allowing choice within that could be effective.
I don't particularly like the idea of standardized gifts across the board because they would likely be the same sometimes-crummy memorabilia from the Greek store on campus, and I don't think everyone wants the same painted picture frames, plastic cups, keychains, and other tchotchkes usually available.
We also have a standard Junior gift to the NM's when they get initiated that we all paid the same amount into, so each NM got the same item from their grandbigs, but if one girl had multiple grandlittles, she didn't pay more money.
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