Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

At the risk of being Debby Downer I need to say:

No, she is not right. If she is an alumna then all she can do is write you a recommendation and talk to actives. It is the ACTIVES alone who will decide on whether or not you are invited to parties or given a bid.

On the upside - unless you were actively involved in a negative relationship with members they will probably barely remember you. There's nothing you can do about the past - work on what you can do to present yourself in the best possible light now.