[imsohappythatiama]

AXO Alum--

The next time you send out these "letters of reference" (which is a fine idea), perhaps you should add a paragraph at the top or bottom of the letter that reads something like this:

I realize that as an initiated, alumna member of AXO, I am unable to write an official recommendation of Polly PNM to XYZ. However, as a member of the Greek community, I wanted to offer this letter of reference attesting to Polly's capacity for loyalty, kindness and dedication. Any NPC sorority would be lucky to accept Polly as a new member... from one Greek to another, I sincerely hope you and your chapter will keep an eye out for Polly as she makes her way through Recruitment this semester.

Panhellenically,

AXO Alum

You're right, the letters you received could have been worded more ... shall we say... delicately. (they are a bit condescending). But the other letter you received was well within the bounds, I think.

You may consider it double-speak (to borrow from Orwell), but in fact it is not.

I assume you wrote your letter to ensure that the PNM in question would get a "second look" during Recruitment--that someone might see her name before the rounds and remember her during voting, or go out of their way to meet her, etc.

All that 2nd letter said was that:
(1) We can't consider your letter as a rec (a fact which you already understood), and

(2) We'll be sure to give Polly a look when she comes through (which, when you get down to it, is really the expected outcome you hoped for when you wrote your letter.)

It might be a little case of CYA on the chapter's part, but as Recruitment Adviser, I say "More CYA now, less boo hoo later."

Next time, just clarify why you're writing the letter. I'm sure inundated Recruitment Chairs will then have a better handle on why you are writing.