Quote:
Originally Posted by justgo_withit
I think the problem is that often PNMs get the impression that mutual selection means that their opinions directly impact where they end up in terms of "If I really like group XYZ and I think I belong there, I will end up there," and then they're upset when they don't get invited back. Because "we can't make you join a group, you get to choose if you pledge there or not" seems like such common sense, they assume that mutual selection means their feelings will lead the selection for daily parties, when actually the chapters' does like Titchou said.
The concept that "mutual selection" stands for seems so obvious that PNMs/less than stellar people advising them have put a different meaning on it that isn't actually real. PNMs hear "it's a mutual selection process" and interpret it as "you can get into that top tier chapter that is way out of your league if you want it bad enough because your opinion matters and you're desperate for good news".
|
Oh I think I get it. PNMs are led to believe that it can matter that they want "us" as much as, or more than, "we" want them. Therefore, they think that their passion and awesomeness will be met with acceptance.
In that case, it sounds like the very common NPHC bitter aspirant or eternal aspirant. However, the feelings of those aspirants do not matter regardless of who gave them misinformation. Regardless of how hard they have tried, we do not have to accept them. It is not uncommon for rejectment aspirants to contact the school, district/local/regional/national entity to force themselves upon the chapter; or to get the chapter in trouble, in general. That sometimes works but they will ALWAYS be the rejectment who had to force herself/himself on the chapter and the GLO.
Not every GLO member made it on their first try for whatever reason(s). That can be disappointing and some people feel rejectment. However, the different interpretations of "mutual selection" does not mean that there is no mutual selection. At the end of this mutual selection, the decisions of the GLO still matter more (even if some aspirants/PNMs choose to decline an invitation for membership).
/pardon lane swerves