Senusret -- thank you.
The only way I can
know if I am going to be welcomed/accepted in an organization is if there is a policy that states it.
The same goes for churches, schools, jobs, etc. etc. that I want to affiliate with. I've become very vigilant about that. Because laws in our country don't provide for my safety and equal treatment, I have to rely on organizational policies.
Otherwise I'm just relying on people to be nice and rely on their own judgement without having any guidance from leadership on the topic, and in the real world, people aren't always nice and don't always do what's kind unless they have guidance, official support, and leadership, i.e., a policy.
I think Sig Ep recently added sexual orientation to its non-discrimination policy. Trust me if that was in place when I was an undergrad, it would have been a major, major factor in my decision of where to rush. I wasn't sure I was gay when I started college, but I sort of knew.
I like some things you mentioned too, Shirley, thank you, but I'm anxious because I don't know what kind of reception I'll receive, and this is big to me, I gave my heart to this organization when I pledged that first semester.
Just like the Catholic church and Scouts retrenched and got extremely conservative and closed-minded about gay issues, I guess my biggest fear is that the fraternities without inclusive policies are in denial mode or retrenchment mode too. And yeah, that's probably a worst case scenario and I am probably worrying too much.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Senusret I
If you are a straight person, you do not have to think about what your daily public proclamations of being straight are - but you do indeed make them.
For gay people, living our lives in the exact same way as you (or any other straight person) may indeed come off as a public announcement, depending on who is observing it.
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Front-loading people about it could make for one awkward moment, but at least I'd have the chance to plan what to say, and I'd find out a lot about their receptivity, and we'd get all those difficult conversations over with, and the air would be clear when all of that is done. That's sort of the proactive way of doing it.
Otherwise, it could make for some surprise moments down-the-line, and if they happen at the wrong place/wrong time or with the wrong person, it might not go so well. That's more like the Don't Ask, Don't Tell way of doing it.