[33girl]

If you feel as though you were initiated under false pretenses, I would honestly contact your national headquarters and petition to be released from membership. It's hard to know if your brothers knew this was really coming or not, but if they did, they should have at least given you and your pledge brothers the knowledge so you could make an informed choice.

Although if you're thinking about going back to school and the school you go to has a chapter of your fraternity, you might be able to affiliate with them. If that's the case, make sure to tell them that you got caught in the middle - i.e. that you were a pledge and not part of the reason the chapter was closed.