I can't recall the details (which sorority and what year), but didn't a PNM going through recruitment collapse and die outside one of the sororities at UT Austin in the late 80's? I don't think this is actually urban legand, because I remember reading about this and wondering how they handled the situation.
Also concur with SWTXBelle: This can bring out the best OR the worst in sisters. I don't know all of the details on your recruitment, but to show lack of sympathy to a NPM (...or anyone else) who had just lost a family member is reprehensible.
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