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Food for thought:
I think, for me, it would have been appropriate to have gently spoken to those young women and cautioned them about their conversation at the time it was happening. That was a teachable moment, if done with respect. And, if I were the advisor for that chapter, I'd be very grateful to another woman who, in Panhellenic spirit, watched out for my actives.
Two nights ago I was in a local restaurant, and I watched two NPC groups from the UofA eating dinner, laughing and talking and teasing each other. Bear in mind these two groups are "rivals" in recruitment, but you'd never know it from their behavior at that restaurant. I called both chapter's advisors and let them know how well their actives represented their chapters while wearing their letters in public.
If you're going to flame me, please save it for later. I've been battling dragons and minotaurs for weeks. My spear has gotten quite a workout. I'm simply offering a different perspective, based on years of supervision and interaction with college-aged people.
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"One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision." Bertrand Russell, The Triumph of Stupidity
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